A couple of years ago, I was leading a lector workshop for a neighboring parish. At one point, I was emphasizing that a lector is a minister at every Mass, even if he or she is not scheduled to read. One of the primary roles of a lector (or any parish leader) is hospitality. I encouraged the lectors to make sure they greeted strangers and welcomed those who might be new in the parish.

At that point, one of the veterans said their parish was very hospitable. In fact, she said, they had a reputation for being one of the most hospitable parishes in the diocese. Most of the other lectors nodded and murmured their agreement. I noticed, however, that one young woman was staring at her feet. I let the murmuring die down and paused for a moment. In almost a whisper, the young woman said, “I’ve been coming here for a year. I came to this workshop today to try to meet some people in the parish, because so far, no one has really talked to me or welcomed me.”

I wish I could say that young woman’s experience was unusual, but I think it might be fairly typical. In almost every parish I visit, the leaders tell me theirs is an extraordinarily hospitable parish. And yet, when I go to Mass in a parish in which I am not known, I almost always have the same experience as the young woman. In the October issue of Today’s Parish Minister, Simone Brosig says:

Christian hospitality is far more than coffee after Mass. It is a bottomless cup filled and emptied through the flow of Trinitarian love. Christian hospitality requires that we recognize the stranger in our midst by seeing Christ in every person and reaching out to draw others into our community. Hospitality is not about doing something hospitable but about being in ever-deeper relationship with one another and with Jesus. Hospitality is not a set of best practices but a disposition. A disposition of hospitality rests upon knowing that at all times everyone has been gifted by God and has something to give. (“Christian hospitality: The key to effective stewardship”)

Share your success stories

I often wonder what it is that keeps us from being more genuinely hospitable in our parishes. And more importantly, how do we change? If you have any insights, please share them. Does your parish have a reputation for being hospitable? If so, how do you measure that? If a stranger shows up this Sunday, do you know for sure that they will be welcomed? What is it that assures you? Thanks for your thoughts.